Like a breath of springtime air,
When you breathed your life on me,
Fresh and new I bloomed right there,
And my eyes began to see
New Horizons,
the colors of Your reflecting glow of love
I am for the first time in many years content with my place in the World. I am happy just to be Bethan, to be myself. My world has revolved so fast this last week, it amuses me. One minute desolate, the next surrounded by a rich and varied family. My timetable for training is jam packed, I hardly have time to think, which is a blessing as I have plenty to think about.
I have always kept myself busy, even in the Wilds of Wales, there was study, composition, exploration, to be done. Here it is a more tangled web we weave, and I find myself at a loss of what to do on my free time. Perhaps I will wonder the countryside for a time, I'm not yearning as I did and do not feel so empty. I could almost go so far as to say that I am close to fulfilled.
One small irk in my perfect life is that I still think about the Snowdons. The old fashioned values I carried with me to this day tell me that I was wrong to kiss Coraline. But it felt very right at the time. Should I continue along this path and find a female to spend the rest of my life with? But then I think of the passion that burns within me for a good looking man. A part of me fears that I can never trust another with my heart after the hurt the Snowdons have caused. Perhaps I should just take the boys advice and "chase some tail" for a while, but this isn't really me either. Time will tell I suppose, at the moment no time to think is a blessing. It is in the quiet times that the ghosts of the past come back to rip our hearts from our sleeves.
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